Thursday, February 02, 2006 by Ospite.

Maria is a young, attractive, Italian server. I am often asked by young male customers that they be sat in her section. She is oftenhit on, and very often stared at...or should I say gawked at, or oggled. She does not flaunt anything, yet repeatedly she complains about customers asking inappropriate questions. Today was no exception.

Guy in late teens , early 20s: "Is Maria working today?"
"She is"
"Seat us in her section." - Ask, people, ask nicely. Demands get you screwed sooner or later.
"I'm sorry sir, I can't do that. She is full today."
"Well, move her to our section."
"She has a party of 15 as well as 2 other tables. I simply cannot grant your request."

I seat them elsewhere and Maria wanders over to me: "Please save me if they try and talk to me, k?"
"Sure thing kiddo."

Sure thing it was. 10 minutes later, they had pulled her aside as she walked past. What threw me was, the 'boy' who requested her was not the one for whom he had made the request. He was sitting to the right of his girflfriend. Across from him, and also the primary sexual deviant, was his father. Early 40s. I cannot remember the last time I've seen a man stare as disgustingly as he. As time went on, he would pull her aside and ask her sexually explicit questions, such as her favorite sexual positions and why.

This topic has been covered elsewhere, but I think it need be repeated.

1. Men seduce women in the context of a social atmosphere. He is out for an evening on the town spending money and enjoying himself. He gets a waitress whose job it is to be perky and extra polite. Does he view this as part of her job description? Of course not. He naturally assumes that she is hitting on him by making eye contact and casual conversation...two things that people find immediately more attractive than looks.

2. The waitress is taking his orders and fullfilling his natural desires of hunger and thirst. Both eating and drinking can be used to heighten erotic behavior. They are the most carnal of human desires...those needed to sustain life. Overdone, to sustain pleasure. Naturally, the woman supplying the answer to his cravings is open to participation.

3. Again the waitress is 'waiting' upon him. When he wants something, she gets it. When he demands something, she 'hops to it.' A man finds a woman attractive who is willing to answer his every whim. In the back of his mind, one of his whims is sexual. She should answer that call and snap to it...fullfilling ALL of his desires is her job. There is a connection to the 'maid fantasy.' All his wants, no commitment.

Sadly, these actions are often the norm rather than the exception. What men should also realize is that these women (ESPECIALLY BARTENDERS) are hit on so regularly they either ignore it, or it pisses them off. The frequency at which they are drooled over and on makes them the women least likely to ever respond positively to blatant on-the-job flirtation. They are simply inaccessable.

On top of the above notations, There are lines that should not be crossed whether the woman is serving you, or if she's attending a party. That line is when the female feels uncomfortable by comments and conversation. A woman will feel abused by far less than a man. Men, learn the line, find the line, and stay on the correct side. If you don't, large men will find ways to make your lives unpleasant...or, we'll simply never seat you near the 'hotties' again.


Blogger Arhyarion said...

This is why I amlost always leave ridiculously large tips for my servers - especially the attractive young ladies. I figure they deserve it for all the crap they have to put up with from other patrons.

4:13 AM  
Blogger Ye Ol' Captain said...

seeing as I'll be working in a restraunt sooner or later during college, I've got a lot to learn. Especially handling the guys.

Love how your post here explains hy they do it, not just another "she got hit on oh em gee!!"

6:30 AM  

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At your service, Ospite

I am not in the restaurant business, I am in the people business. I use every opportunity to people watch, because to me, even the most mundane is fascinating.

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